I have found that praying doesn't work when following another prayer with NVC. Prayer for me has just resulted in more guilty feelings and if I cannot forgive myself then how will I ever be able to trust that God will do it? It just doesn't make sense;
For my son Jacob at the moment he is scared that Mummy will get lost... (he's 3)and it is because he knows that even though he wants to do things like catch the train by himself he won't as he has admitted that he doesn't know the way home (my Gran's at the moment)... and to prove to him that I am not lost we have set up calling me on the mobile to reassure him I can be found. (I hope that he doesn't take this to heart for him though... )
Until we experience something ourselves then it isn't as true as it needs to be for us to be able to trust in it. This is just apart of the growing process that I tend to forget as a parents and as much as I try and show him real things I am not ready to let any animal die so that he can see how dangerous electricity is. So there is limitation here too.
I have headed back to church... this is something that has been a long time coming... though in saying this it doesn't mean that I am a complete believer of what my home church is about... I can still see the little contradictions... but I am here to learn to live and accept pain... to learn how to be brave in spite of it being a difficult journey... to practice hearing others' pain and being empathic not listening with sympathy... (I'll put up a difference later).
ReplyDeleteWith the development of these skills hopefully I will accept contraindications of a church… hopefully one that is the least flawed/best aligns with my values…
I hope to show this strength to my children… learn about multiple churches/religions so that they too can go through this process to find their faith.
Yet right now and until they do I need to remember to BE THE ROLE MODDEL.